Is this the ultimate insult?

My normal clothing for going to the allotment is...a pair of tatty tracksuit bottoms...an even tattier polo necked jumper..a pair of farmyard manure covered wellies and a straw hat.

The allotment society secretary visited today to see if I was managing OK. He made a few nice comments about my efforts and then said "We have been wondering why the birds nick some of our crops but never seem to touch yours. I now understand why. Its the way you dress, the birds must thing you have a scarecrow wandering about your plot during the daylight hours."

I didn't sulk.....honest

I was thinking as soon as I read you dress description "what a picture. Must look a bit like "Worzel Gummidge" and then as I read on My thoughts were correct.
It was when I got to the straw hat the I laughed out loud .
Well done :-rolling

It tickled me as well.....Mind you the first one to ask for a photo of the said image gets a visit from the men in dark glasses that will be travelling in a black limo. LOL

Are you sure?.....................I would have thought The men in Wile coats and a white wagon :icon_lol:

No Chocky....the white coats and white vans are for the likes of you....now then is it you and I or is it you and me....Oh what the heck....us. That is ,fans of the goon shows, Round the Horne etc etc. The black limo is for the ones that want to make me look silly, when I am perfectly capable of doing that myself. By the way, the original story is true, only the names were changed to protect the innocent. (can anyone remember where that line came from?)

Dragnet. With Jack web

Yep ..... spot on, can you remember the words of the opening sequence. Be warned ma'am, I have a different (silly) version...I know you are game for a laugh......so what were the original words spoken in the intro

The story you are about to see is true. Only the names have been changed to protect the innocent

What about " this is a city," etc

Some thing like
This is a city. I'm a cop. My name is Jo Friday. Sgt Jo Friday

Did you know Jack Webb created and produced that series

You are again ...spot on...this is a city, Los Anglese Calafornia.........

The silly version ( which for anyone that never saw the original, will mean zip) is

This is a city, Los anglese California, I work here I'm a cop, My name is saturday................This story has a weekend ( week end) Oh dear wot 've I done

Sorry. Don't remember that version.

I thought Jack Web was fantastic.

Jack Webb was the original and the best. My previous post was a joke.How did we get from me being insulted to Jack Webb

You said the name had been changed to protect the innocent. I think you probably meant the insane